Unfortunate Work Events

Merry Christmas!

Here’s hoping your office parties were extra unfortunate and drunken this year, so that you’ll have lots of hilarious pictures to send us!

Peace on Earth,
UWE

Once a conga line starts forming, and there aren’t any attractive half-naked Brazilians involved, you know it’s time to call it a night. Especially when the old dude from accounting starts grabbing your ass.

In the spirit of Halloween, the office decided to have a Jackass-O-Lantern contest.

The glee this humble office worker is feeling, sandwiched as he is between two foxy coworkers, is nothing compared to the shame he’ll feel when he drunkenly (and unsuccessfully) asks them to go home with him a couple of hours later.

The fact that this semi-dorky IT guy type managed to get the boss to let his band play at the office party is cool enough. But the band is also called “Carcass,” which makes it all the better. Strangely, they don’t look too happy about it.

How can we possibly connect to our Gen-X employees in a way they’ll totally relate to? I know! With a dead Vegas stereotype!

All hail Chief Office Douche!

This is some sort of Cat’s Cradle-esque team building exercise that looks like it’s about as much fun as actual work. I like how the front row seems to be lined up in descending order of enthusiasm. The guy to the far right in the second row seems to have the correct facial expression…rage.

These guys’ Village People routine is a mess. First of all, there’s no fireman in The Village People. There’s a cop and a sailor/soldier, but no fireman. And where’s the leather-clad motorcycle fetish guy? Clearly the dude in the middle was assigned that character, and he pussied out at the last minute. Typical.

Oh, and one of them is a woman.

The secretarial pool concludes their Broadway revue with a rousing rendition of “Climb Ev’ry Mountain.”